Judith Lautner (judith) wrote,
Judith Lautner

Living as an undepressed person

It isn't hard to figure out that I tend to go on binges when there are unresolved, unfinished things in my life. Just today, after eating a bagel and a mocha (for which I paid $5, enough to buy a decent sandwich), I went to a nearby drugstore and looked into the freezer, hoping to find an innocent ice cream thing. I could not find what I wanted so I ventured into the candy aisles. It hit me suddenly that this could be the start of an unending trip down that road. One candy bar, then another, then a bag of them, each time telling myself it is just this one or just this half-dozen or just today or just this week...

I didn't buy any candy. I did go to an am-pm and buy a dish of soft-serve ice cream. I feel very full now. I want to go home and take everything off.

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