Judith Lautner (judith) wrote,
Judith Lautner

Name that fear

Over the weekend I got to thinking about fears again. It is fears that hold us, keep us from getting where we may want to go. We are always facing fears in therapy.

I realized that the fear this time is of rejection, abandonment. I want to face this. To face it, I have to risk abandonment or rejection and be okay with the result. Be ready for the pain, not regret it.

I wrote to Dwain after seeing the play Saturday night, telling him I felt hurt about the things he had not told me. I had to remind myself that it does not matter if my feelings are legitimate or not. What matters is that I felt this way, and that I tell him how I felt.

He responded angrily, then followed that up with an apology. I was so glad! An angry response is so much more real than a considered, thoughtful response, or nothing at all. But I had to be ready for anything, worst of all ready for nothing. I felt that I was.

  • The Jerry Bruckheimer Effect

    I suppose it is the curse of anyone who is musical to be unable to ignore music. I am plagued by the piped in music in stores and I choke when I hear…

  • Adventures Downtown

    Yesterday I went downtown three times. The first time I passed by the pasty place and decided to stop and get one. The second time was to pick up a…

  • (no subject)

    NetworkedBlogs Blog: Judith's Topics: Personal, Mental Illness, Animal Rights Follow my blog

  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded