December 3rd, 2006


Slug central

As has become my habit, I am sitting at my computer in my nightshirt. Some days I don't actually get dressed until noon or after. That doesn't mean I do nothing, but it's damned close. I work on various web sites, I read email and respond, and I read. That's the usual. Sometimes I do some exploring or working on various other types of projects.

Then of course there's cat time. Stretch likes to jump in my lap and settle down while I am at the computer. Or on the couch. Bullet will often lie down near my feet. He's never been one to get too close too often, but it's clear he wants to be near me. He also seems to be having some older-age issues. Jumping up is not as easy for him as it used to be.  I like to reach down and touch him. He always yells at me when I do that but I swear it's just his way of talking. He isn't mad at me.

frisbee golf in the late afternoon

I have gotten nice and fat again. It is difficult to stay focused on changing that. But I am willing to start over as often as needed. The day before yesterday I put in time at the gym, and today I decided to go for a little walk. Little walks are all I do because it just hurts here and there. Hurts from arthritis and hurts from age and hurts from just carrying so much weight. Although when I was younger it wasn't as painful, of course, just being overweight.

I walked on the path by the railroad tracks until I came next to Sinsheimer Park. In the unimproved area on the fringe of the park is a frisbee golf setup. Frisbee golf course, I guess it's called, really. I watched a group of young adults - college students, I'm sure - playing the course, having a good time. I found a place to sit and watched them and the ease with which they moved and the easy way they had with each other. I envied them the physical ease.

On my way home I stopped to sit on a concrete wall for a bit, and I watched some children playing in the street. When I was that age I spent my time in the street, too. I played various types of ball games, mostly, with various neighborhood kids and my sister Mary. I think that in those days just living on the street gave you some kind of in to whatever kid game was going on. The farther I got from that block the more difficult it was for me to fit in, however. I was fat then, too. And not very good at keeping myself clean. And kids are, believe it, the cruelest people when they spot a victim like me.

Still, on that street I played. I wanted to fit in and I tried, and I don't remember actually hurting when I ran - oh, well, yes, once in a while if I had to run too far too fast I would get winded and get side splints. Most of the time the games were not that taxing physically. When I think back on it now I wonder how I got out there at all and did that. It's a kind of kid thing, I guess. I have seen Joey do that, just go up to other kids and play with them, not really thinking much about it.

I made it back, once again determined to get out there, again and again. Start over again and again.