June 10th, 2004


Headaches and hands

I woke and have been unable to sleep. I have an incipient or actual headache - it isn't full-blown yet but the fogginess is there, and it seems to be worse when I lie down. I also was bothered by itchiness on one of my hands. I got up to wash it with Zanfel and it seems okay now. But my mind is restless.

Being able to get up in the middle of the night, open my laptop and write in my journal is a dream. I love being wireless and have trouble imagining going back to plugging in and dialing up, although I do dialup when I'm out of town and not near a free wireless provider. Even at Elaine's place I have to plug in, cable modem.

I am reading, still, Sidney Blumenthal's Clinton Wars. It is clear that Blumenthal does not hold back his own feelings, and that's his right. But he provides documentation for his beliefs and statements. I am beginning to see this larger neo-con movement more clearly now, as I read about it from different perspectives. It's rather like the hijacking of democracy. So strange that a group that runs on "patriotism" is so fundamentally against the basic concepts of free speech. This isn't the type reading that is recommended for just before sleep...I should be reading "affirmations", words to live by, stuff like that. I don't really understand how that helps one sleep, though. I do see that reading something that shocks me and gets me worked up has to work against sleep.