May 10th, 2003



I woke with a headache during the night. Not a throbbing killer, but enough to interfere with sleeping. I even dreamed that I had gotten up and taken some Excedrin migraine, but when I got up later realized that I hadn't.

I took some now, hope to feel it working soon.


I am trying to get various programs working on my web sites, and trying to develop new templates for the photo pages for the foundation site, and I keep running into blocks I can't seem to get past. Wondering what I am doing wrong. It isn't all that fun, toughing it out, sometimes. I wish Elaine were investigating the same web stuff I am, but she's not. Sigh. Makes me long for a class.


There is a little hike in El Chorro Park that winds its way through beautiful oak woodlands, offers amazing views, climbs up to a special rock, ends in a meadow. This hike I took today, late in the day. Thus I saw only two other people while on it.

When I got to the top, Eagle Rock, I sat there, ate a banana, read part of a book, and mostly just sat and listened and felt the wind and saw the hills, the highway, the golf course below me. I closed my eyes and lay back on a lower rock, where it was almost comfortable. I could feel the warmth of the sun along with the stiff breeze, and it was perfect. I let in the sounds, tried to let out the thoughts. But I didn't get rid of them.

It occurred to me that I am afraid of nothing. Literally. I would rather be afraid of something. I can deal with that.