March 21st, 2002



I get my teeth cleaned today. I like doing it in the morning so it's done with. It isn't all that awful but there is something about teeth. I never like having anything done to them.

Who am I?

Today I went into a local coffee place and was settled at a back table, reading and drinking and eating a cookie, when a local designer walked in. He was talking to others in the shop for a while, then when he looked up I waved at him lightly. He said hi and said something to the others about my being a planner at Pismo.

When I was headed out the door a little later, I said "bye" in a general way, and the designer said, "Goodby, Miss Lautner". I gave him a funny smile and left. I wondered and wonder what that "Miss" meant, whether it was a sign of respect or what. I think in a way that it was, because he's a guy who has certain learning disabilities (to which he admits), and that means all of us have had to spend a lot of time saying no to him or telling him to do things over or to be sure to write things down. Sort of like teachers, I imagine. So maybe that's what I seem like to him.

And who was she?

I am reading "Loving Picasso" by Fernande Olivier, perhaps Picasso's greatest love. She was with him ten years. The book starts with her early journals, when she was fifteen. I find the writing remarkably good and the thoughts almost out of fiction. If I had read this as fiction I would have thought, "Oh sure. Like she'd think that." Shakes me up a bit, trying to understand her.