January 18th, 2002


It's my birthday

Yeah. 56 years old. Breakfast with the gang this morning, at a cajun cafe. I had an odd breakfast of poached eggs on artichoke bottoms, sitting on a bed of dark creamed spinach that had a spicy taste. Hashbrowns, toast on the side. Hollandaise sauce intended to be on the eggs but I had that on the side. I didn't eat too much so I feel okay.

I feel very tired still though. I would love to take a nap. I feel very very lazy.

Yet I am thinking about the weekend, what to do. Elaine called, suggested Big Sur hiking. I have looked at a few web sites and it is looking like a good plan. Camera, water, sweater, journal, find a hike about two miles each direction and that should do me. Maybe go to the Henry Miller gallery. That sounds interesting. And maybe I'll see a California Condor! Elaine said she did when she was last there.


This time from lack of sleep, I think. I noticed, when looking through past entries here, that I get a LOT of headaches. I deliberately noted them in here in case the question came up in a medical review. I haven't gone to any doctor about them for quite a while, though. I did get a book yesterday on migraines - what your doc doesn't tell you. It promotes a combination of elements, common vitamins and feverfew in a particular dosage. I am going to try it.

How I see this journal

I have kept journals sporadically for many years. I often feel compelled to write down something I have just noticed or realized, and feel restless until I have done so. When I found livejournal - the link was offered to me by my "creativity coach" in early 2001 - I felt this would be a convenient way to keep a journal. I am almost always near a computer somewhere or other. So wherever I am and whether or not I have remembered to bring a notebook, I can jot down my thoughts and be sure they will be stored in chronological order.

My journal is for me. I don't write it for anyone else. I had no intention of attracting friends through this journal, although it did occur to me that someone who is interested in me could look here and learn a lot. That's worth something to me, saves me repeating myself too much. And weeds out people who might think they would get along with me but really wouldn't. Therefore, the public nature of the journal does have value to me. But it is not the primary reason I write here.

My thoughts and opinions are my own and I have a right to them. I am not interested in debating here. I can easily find a debate in a livejournal community, a chat room, a forum, or in everyday life. This place is mine and I can't understand a person choosing to argue with me here. However misguided my thoughts may be, they are mine. So my message is, don't try to pick a fight with me here, please.

Which doesn't mean that if you think you have some kind of help to offer me that I don't want you to offer it. I welcome your offers. I won't always respond to every comment, and I hope that you don't think this means I didn't read them or don't care. Sometimes the answer is just more than I feel like making at the time. Other times I am just too involved in too much else.

For my part, I will try not to be confrontational in your journals! I have mistakenly gotten into arguments in other personal journals and I think it was inappropriate for me to do so. I just don't think it's the right way to treat someone's personal space. If you feel the need to remind me of this pledge from time to time, I don't mind!

I hope that those of you who do read this journal find it at least mildly entertaining and sometimes enlightening at times. I am egotistical enough to want to be heard at times, to want to feel others want to hear from me. I don't feel ashamed of my bad moods; I think they are part of who I am. There is very little of my life that I am not willing for others to know.

(no subject)

Kathy Smith tonight.

I am going to New Frontiers to get some fresh tofu, some seeds for sprouting, and some of that migraine stuff. At least it will get me out of the house. It's a little sad that I am spending my night here alone! Some birthday. Like I'm the only one who ever has lived alone.