It isn't just that I am thinking of Dwain, although I am. I am also cold. I just turned on the heater. I don't like it getting too hot when I sleep so I leave it off, but I am shivering now.
Thoughts turning around in my head, over and over. A kind of emptiness but it isn't the great big hole it might be. I could weather this okay. I hope so.
Perhaps emotional pain and sleeplessness cause weight loss. 197 today.
And boy, do I feel sleep-deprived. My head has that thuggish feeling, my eyes feel like they've been crying - I only had one small bout of that. And I think the weight loss has more to do with not eating anything later at night.
The lack of sleep is starting to tell. I just want to lie down.
I have been corresponding with Elaine on the breakup and she has a good understanding and sympathy. I am feeling stronger, capable. I look good today and I think that helps. But I want to go buy something at lunch, something nice to wear.
I finished writing in the manuscript I am editing and sent it back to the author. I had to go to the post office because they won't accept packages over one pound with stamps on the envelope. It all seemed to take too much time. But while I was downtown I went across the street to Downtown Centre and found a new book to read. I sat outside for a little, reading the book I am finishing. A book that seems to have trouble ending right. Ending.