August 28th, 2001


(no subject)

slight headache this morning. I think it's just that general worry. The rehearsal last night was good, Rachmaninoff's Vespers. Going to be wonderful, I can tell.

Living as an undepressed person

It isn't hard to figure out that I tend to go on binges when there are unresolved, unfinished things in my life. Just today, after eating a bagel and a mocha (for which I paid $5, enough to buy a decent sandwich), I went to a nearby drugstore and looked into the freezer, hoping to find an innocent ice cream thing. I could not find what I wanted so I ventured into the candy aisles. It hit me suddenly that this could be the start of an unending trip down that road. One candy bar, then another, then a bag of them, each time telling myself it is just this one or just this half-dozen or just today or just this week...

I didn't buy any candy. I did go to an am-pm and buy a dish of soft-serve ice cream. I feel very full now. I want to go home and take everything off.

working it

No. 82, I believe. Tonight and last night I did the "easier" ones. I now use soft hand weights for the low-impact aerobic portions. This, plus the heavier barbells makes these workouts okay. Not as tough as some others but still something. Tonight, for some reason, I seemed more tired than usual and the stretches seemed to hurt more, particularly the calf stretches. It's good, anyway, that I did it.

short story

Ah, these many moons later, I finally put my short story in an envelope to enter the SLO Nightwriters contest. I expected to have at least one other entry by now, but haven't been writing! Also, I don't like this story as much now as I did when I first wrote it. I figure that's a growth thing, so that's okay, that's good. I need to get stamps.