Judith Lautner (judith) wrote,
Judith Lautner
judith

another one

Ray hit on it this time. He said he felt the real question, with Dwain, is - should I entrust myself to someone who is so insensitive to my feelings? That made me think - that too has been the case again and again. Me, trying to get love from those who don't care about me? Is that it? Something akin to that. An impossibility.

Years ago I did a role-play in a therapy group. I spoke to my father. I didn't want to do it because I could not come up with anything to say that would work. but when I was faced with the empty chair supposed to be my father, and was asked, what do I want from him? I said, "I want you to be someone else". I knew he could not be what I needed. And so I keep going on finding people who can't be what I need. Now what the hell does this mean???
Subscribe

  • The Jerry Bruckheimer Effect

    I suppose it is the curse of anyone who is musical to be unable to ignore music. I am plagued by the piped in music in stores and I choke when I hear…

  • Adventures Downtown

    Yesterday I went downtown three times. The first time I passed by the pasty place and decided to stop and get one. The second time was to pick up a…

  • (no subject)

    NetworkedBlogs Blog: Judith's Topics: Personal, Mental Illness, Animal Rights Follow my blog

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 0 comments