Judith Lautner (judith) wrote,
Judith Lautner

More thinking

I think that I approach this love thing as I approach so much else in my life. I work at it, try to get good at it, try to be very good at it. Like it's a class. That's why I figure I would be good at an arranged marriage. But does this mean I am bad at other types of relationships? That - more likely - I try when I shouldn't? I didn't try so much with Roy, although at the same time I didn't face things squarely either. I avoid conflict. I want discussion, am happy with discussion, but I fear conflict that could lead to something permanently changing for the worst, to the end.

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