Judith Lautner (judith) wrote,
Judith Lautner

working working

I did one of my new FIRM videos for the first time: The Tortoise. It is really for more advanced people, but I did what I could modify. It requires a barbell, which I do not have, and a small step, lower than what I have. So I did what I could. There are several segments featuring dance steps, like the cha cha. A bonus if I get onto them.

When I walked into the house this afternoon, later than usual, I felt such a lurch of loneliness. I keep reminding myself that I am enough, that I am better off, that this is not my fault, I am everything I ever was and more. This evening is no different from so many others. I need to get more revved up so I can get things done, not just veg around and feel sorry for myself. The video helped. My headache came and went and right now it isn't bad. I ate a sald, which I think helped too.

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